Walking into the Stormy Sea of Transition

Stormy Sea by Alexlinde on deviantART

Transitions great and small are a part of our lives. And what may seem insurmountable today may well look insignificant tomorrow.

For my son, halfway through pre-K, the transition to kindergarten was the most terrifying thing he could imagine. He did not possess a frame of reference that would allow him to understand that in a few short months, he would be ready for that change. All he knew was that he was being asked to walk into the raging, boundlessness of the ocean. He had no way to know if the waters would part and he would walk across on dry land or if he would rise above the waves to walk on top. He saw waves. Big, powerful, swallow-you-up waves. And he was expected to walk into them and potentially drown.

Likewise, when I took my son and left an abusive marriage, I had no window into the future. I had no way to imagine a life with emotional security or financial stability. While I kept looking at the past and focusing on the parts of it I dreaded giving up, I knew I didn't like the alternative I was facing. And so, like my son, I choose to walk into the tumultuous, stormy sea.

There were dark days when it felt like the riptide would pull me under. There were days when the storm was less intense and I could float and bask in the sense of personal safety that was now a part of my life. 

As the days past, there was no magical parting of the waters. There was no abracadabra moment where I found myself walking on top of the waves. I needed to build my own raft. I had to make choices that allowed me to move from struggling, to surviving, to eventually thriving.

The choices you are facing as you work to build your own raft may very well be different. And while it most likely doesn't feel like you are wise enough or smart enough, trust that you are. 

Start by figuring out what you need most to begin to calm the storm. For me, I realized that if I was to maintain my independence, I needed to solidify my finances. I had a job, but I didn't have a spending plan and found that I kept running short. I sat down with my son, who was ten at the time, and created a plan. Having him play a role in the process ended up being a major part of our success.

Just taking one step will create a buoy to help keep you a float and start to shift the control back to you. So what is that first step for you? 

#change, #transitions, #choice